pregnancy

Friday, January 16, 2009

Catching Up & Introspection

Here are my calorie counts from Mon-Thurs:
Monday: 1431 cals, 29g fat, 186g carb, 113g protein
Tuesday: 1276 cals, 40g fat, 146g carb, 88g protein
Wednesday: 1478 cals, 31g fat, 195g carb, 99g protein
Thursday: 1486 cals, 26g fat, 219g carb, 103g protein

Tuesday I had the least calories, but the most fat. That came from having pb on bread, and trying flax in my breakfast smoothie. I can have natural pb, but I do have to be careful about overstepping my limits. I didn't that day, but could have easily.

Workouts:
Monday: none :(
Tuesday: cardio and weights
Wednesday: cardio
Thursday: none, again. :(
Today: I haven't done it yet, but I am going to, at least, do some cardio. I will do some weights and more cardio tomorrow.

I'm recognizing more now how much of an emotional eater I was. Something, actually 2 separate incidents, happened yesterday that really upset me. I realized later, that the thought of cookies or ice cream kept returning to my mind. That made me see again that I'd always tried to 'cure' myself of my worries. It doesn't work that way. That kind of self-medication makes you sicker, adds to your problem.

Life doesn't go away. Trying to change what you can change, and dealing with the things you can't change are the only options. For me, eating ice cream or whatever wasn't actually dealing with the things I couldn't change...it just very temporarily focused my energy on the taste of something. The problem is that taste doesn't last...only 'inner peace', so to speak, will do that. When the taste is gone, you will just want more masking. And more. And more. I don't want to be an addict anymore. I do want to work to change, and I am.

4 comments:

Jandawoman said...

I was an emotional eater too. Anything would set me off. I'd make cookies or bread items all the time "for the family." But really, it was for me. That was the way it was, but not now. I finally got FED UP and did something different... I'm 62 lbs lower today and my only regret is that it wasn't until I was 45 yrs old until that decision came... and that was a few years ago. Today I deal with life much better and not with junk food.
Keep up the good work. It is all worth it. Jan

Patty said...

I am right there with you Char. I do the same things. I still struggle, though it is mostly under control, but with out cutting it all out of my life I am still tempted. What I have to do is overcome the temptations. It is so hard. My sister in law just mentioned to me the other day cookie dough, and I had to have it. I hate that. Some times I just don't want to be strong but I have to get through it some times. That's why I like having my blogs, and friends going through the same thing. I love you and I know you can do this.

The Boehme Family said...

I still can't get over the urge to bake when I am having a bad day. I, like Jandawoman, would make things "for my family," but since then we, as a family, take our baked goods to someone else. So, I still get to do my emotional baking, just not the eating. I just hope the person I deliver them to isn't cursing me for ruining THEIR diet!

Elizabeth said...

I am so proud of you! When I stop being scared of failure again, I'll do it--Thanks for the video. It is so true! So what's my problem? OK--I'm going to put on my running shoes and do something now!